A Woman Set a Forest Fire That Burned 51,000 Acres . . . Because Her Firefighter Friends Were Bored
And the total cost to fight the fire was $7.9 MILLION.
A Guy Dressed in a Full Body Penguin Costume Steals Beer From a Convenience Store
We've got a criminal here who's dressed as a penguin . . . but he's a little too small time to be THE Penguin. 

A Man Says He Couldn't Have Flashed His Junk . . . It's Too Short

And now the court is having his junk officially measured !